This video made me think of who I would want to take
to lunch to get to know better, someone who I may not see eye to eye with at
work. Immediately I thought of someone who used to work in my department that,
given a chance to have lunch with her, I would so that I could understand how
our dynamic became so broken. First let me provide some background. Tracy
started working in the financial aid office about 6 months before I did and
when I came on board I was very impressed with her knowledge and when given a
choice on who I wanted as an office mate I picked her. At first, everything was
great, I asked questions and she seemed so willing to help me. As I became more
comfortable I asked less questions and gained a lot more confidence.
After six months I went to the manager and asked for
more work. I wasn’t bored at all, I just wanted to continue to learn my job and
expand my student base so that I could help in more areas. This initiative that
I took didn’t go unnoticed and two years after being there I was promoted to
manager (four years after that, I was promoted to assistant director and then
two years ago, associate director). I was thrilled and took on my new
challenges head on. Everyone in the office excited about my promotion except
for Tracy. In her eyes, she had been there longer therefore she should have
gotten the promotion not me. To her it was all based on seniority not knowledge
or ability to get the job done. Any time a new employee came on board, she made
a point of telling them that she should be the one in my position. This caused
some tension in the office at times.
Looking back on this now, I would have loved to have
taken her to lunch. It would have been so easy to do in the early days of her
disdain for my advancement in the workplace to ask her to be open and honest
with how it made her feel. Was she mad that she was not promoted? Did she want
to be promoted? Talking to her about what was bothering her may or may not have
made a difference in how she interacted with the office and how the office
interacted with her over the years. Tracy was always willing to help campuses
or students; however, she became very defensive if she was told something was
not done correctly on an account. She immediately shut down and no matter what
was said you couldn’t convince that there was a better, easier, or correct way
to work the account.
The advantages of having an open and honest dialogue
with others in the workplace helps in many ways. First, it provides a sense of
trust and understanding within the department. Knowing that everyone is
comfortable talking to each other helps with the feeling of community. You can go
to each other for help, to vent about an issue, or just talk about life in
general. Second, the work environment is pleasant, everyone wants to come to
work because it a place that fosters cohesiveness, empowerment, collaboration
and being a part of something bigger.
It takes one person who will not or cannot be a part
of the group for whatever reason, that will tear down that cohesiveness and
keep a department divided. Sadly, in some cases the only way to fix this is to
get rid of that person who is causing the problem. Maybe having lunch with her
early on would have changed that. I know that should I come across this
situation again I will not let it fester I will approach it head on with
fairness, openness and communicate in a way that we both feel comfortable with.
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